Strange occurence the other day...
Sitting at the computer on a particularly slow day, just doing my MySpace thing, the phone rings. The caller is a female grad. student looking for a little help with citations on (something).
“Fine,” I say, “Great! Let’s get it done! I can make an appointment for you right now!” We go through the whole bureaucratic rigmarole and she asks my name for clarification purposes. “Dale,” I say. I say this because it’s my name.
Here, incredulity sets in on the writer’s part: “Not Dale…Eisinger?”
No big deal, I figure, as TONS of people have heard of me (cough). “Why yes of course! How many Dales do you know who don’t live in rustic shacks?”
“Dale,” she says “this is Ramona-Jo Pemberton [Names have been changed to protect the innocent.] Remember me? I used to baby sit you when your parents lived on the Mesa.”
Now, I have to interject in the tale, here, with an aside: I don’t really care what this woman knows about me. She probably has seen my privates in the changing of a diaper, has seen me fall of various tricycles, and knows of the displeasure I previously had in the presence of my brother (yeah, let’s say that). In fact, I remember one incident where this woman’s daughter and I put clothespins on each other’s noses and wailed bloody oblivion, unable to take them off. But, as always, WRITING IS PARAMOUNT! I’m totally down to help out dear old Ramona-Jo.
“Would it be weird if I came in to work with you?”
Here, I take on the affect of a British lord: “Not at all! We shall talk citations until the Celts clamber over the hills!”
She lets me make an appointment for her and I honestly can’t wait to see her. Back to MySpace. And then the phone again. To my pleasure, it is Ramona-Jo Pemberton, my dear old baby sitter!
“Dale,” she says, “I DON’T WANT TO DO A CONSULTATION WITH YOU.” She actually screams this (or so I remember). It’s all very upsetting.
“Well, do you want me to make another appointment for you?”
“No. I don’t. I really don’t.”
So there you have it, folks. I did something so psychologically damaging to this lady that she doesn’t want to come into the writing center at all. AT ALL. The mere possibility of my presence is enough for Ramona-Jo Pemberton’s citations to go un-reviewed. This is a tragedy, I say. A TRAGEDY! Have any of you had similar experiences? I mean, but a lot less surreal?
“Fine,” I say, “Great! Let’s get it done! I can make an appointment for you right now!” We go through the whole bureaucratic rigmarole and she asks my name for clarification purposes. “Dale,” I say. I say this because it’s my name.
Here, incredulity sets in on the writer’s part: “Not Dale…Eisinger?”
No big deal, I figure, as TONS of people have heard of me (cough). “Why yes of course! How many Dales do you know who don’t live in rustic shacks?”
“Dale,” she says “this is Ramona-Jo Pemberton [Names have been changed to protect the innocent.] Remember me? I used to baby sit you when your parents lived on the Mesa.”
Now, I have to interject in the tale, here, with an aside: I don’t really care what this woman knows about me. She probably has seen my privates in the changing of a diaper, has seen me fall of various tricycles, and knows of the displeasure I previously had in the presence of my brother (yeah, let’s say that). In fact, I remember one incident where this woman’s daughter and I put clothespins on each other’s noses and wailed bloody oblivion, unable to take them off. But, as always, WRITING IS PARAMOUNT! I’m totally down to help out dear old Ramona-Jo.
“Would it be weird if I came in to work with you?”
Here, I take on the affect of a British lord: “Not at all! We shall talk citations until the Celts clamber over the hills!”
She lets me make an appointment for her and I honestly can’t wait to see her. Back to MySpace. And then the phone again. To my pleasure, it is Ramona-Jo Pemberton, my dear old baby sitter!
“Dale,” she says, “I DON’T WANT TO DO A CONSULTATION WITH YOU.” She actually screams this (or so I remember). It’s all very upsetting.
“Well, do you want me to make another appointment for you?”
“No. I don’t. I really don’t.”
So there you have it, folks. I did something so psychologically damaging to this lady that she doesn’t want to come into the writing center at all. AT ALL. The mere possibility of my presence is enough for Ramona-Jo Pemberton’s citations to go un-reviewed. This is a tragedy, I say. A TRAGEDY! Have any of you had similar experiences? I mean, but a lot less surreal?
You must have been one evil child, Dale. What did you do, man, what did you do???
ReplyDeleteDale, this lady's passionate stance against the BSU writing center because (apparently) of you, wobbles my own belief in the center. Perhaps you should take on a pseudonym and disguise, to distance yourself from the Evil Child Dale.
ReplyDeleteFoul Dale! Bane of writing centers and workshops! Despicable monster mess!
ReplyDeleteThis comment has been removed by the author.
ReplyDeleteOh, what are the odds? Weird...you must've really did a number on her! All joking aside, maybe just thought that the situation was wierd--some poeple are funny about stuff like that. I'm just waiting for the time when some astranged ex-boyfriend comes through the door...
ReplyDeleteI.
ReplyDeleteI don't even.
Huh.
Well, on the plus side, you have a very humourous story (which you told very well, by the way) to share with your kids the night they encounter their first babysitter. "Your challenge, children of my loins," you will say when your wife nips to the loo before you two leave for a night of dancing, "is to emotionally damange this young lady so that years from now, she will be terrified of a mere APA discussion with you. God speed!"
Precious.
Dale,
ReplyDeleteThat is hilarious... what did you do to that woman! Did you bite her as a child, what!
I can't help but agree with everyone else; this is hilarious Dale! But what's mind boggling is that she went from making the appointment with you to not wanting to come in at all. What did she remember between phone calls?
ReplyDeleteOn a much less entertaining note..While I've not yet had a like experience, I have had consultations with persons from the past (and present too). How is a consultation with a friend (or acquaintance even) different from a consultation with a stranger? How do the dynamics differ? Does your personal knowledge of or relationship with this person change the way you read their work? Is this a pro or con?